Post Separation Family Therapy

Separating occurs within all relationship structures including marriages, DeFacto relationships and partnerships. The tasks required in a separation process depend on the nature of shared commitments that existed within the relationship.  When children are involved, the separation process is often more complex. Separation/divorce is considered the second most stressful life experience, second only to death of a spouse according to the well-established life event stress scale (Holmes & Rahe, 1967; Wallace et. al., 2023). This tool lists significant life events (weighted from population-based research) allocating each life event a "stress rating" indicating potential health risks. The process by which families navigate the separation/divorce can reduce or increase stress. Post separation family therapy focuses on the emotional process of separating. For families where children are involved, the therapy process holds front and centre that relationships between parents must evolve into a co-parenting relationship and contact is required beyond the divorce for many years ahead. 

The strongest predictor of poor child adjustment after separation is conflict between the separated parents. Children are particularly affected when the conflict is about them, or issues around parenting (Halford, 2018). Research related to child outcomes post separation continues to recommend a focus on the co-parenting relationship as the most effective intervention point for improving child outcomes. Post separation family therapy intervenes and works with the co-parenting relationship and the barriers or "stuck points" in the co-parenting relationship. 

For families who are divorcing, there are legal processes required to formalise this. The process of making decisions in relation to the children and finances, during a time of incredible stress and emotion, is a significant challenge for all families divorcing. Post separation family therapy is not intended to be a process to facilitate agreements on parenting or financial matters (there are other services designed to assist people with these tasks), rather it is a process designed to assist families to work through the high emotion and stress that can get in the way of flexible thinking and decision making about post separation matters. Most importantly, the process focuses on the co-parenting relationship and privileging children's needs. Post separation family therapy facilitates a process of self-management in this new emotional world post separation and generates thinking focused on how each person defines their responsibilities as a co-parent and what it will take to step into those responsibilities.